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26 February 2007 @ 10:42 am
The Oscars - The Good, Bad & UUUUgly  
"Fashions have done more harm than revolutions." - Victor Hugo

The winners were predictable, and I really have no issue with them, so let's get down to business.  The dresses!

Gwenneth Paltrow had a very nice dress.  Unfortunately, she's had a child and is no longer 22, so Gwen, honey, invest in a bra.  I know, I know, none of us wants to admit that gravity is a mean bitch, but she is.  Foundation. Garment.  Okay?  Thanks.

Jennifer Hudson.  I love her.  I do.  She was the underdog.  They treated her like crap on American Idol, and she rocked it in Dreamgirls.  But I don't give a crap if her dress was Oscar de la Renta or not, FORMAL DRESSES SHOULD NOT HAVE POCKETS.  And even if they do, you do not hook your thumbs in them, hillbilly-style.  The jacket...  even in my tipsy haze, I could see that it didn't work...  and in the clear light of day, I see that I was right.  Did she have no freinds to tell her it was bad?  Surely one of mine would step up.  Ah, well, Jen.  Live and learn.  But you won, so hey, screw 'em, right?

Maggie Gyllenhaal lost one of the straps to her dress before she got there.  I saw her looking for it.

Ellen was funny without being cruel.  I like her.

Jack Black, John C Reilly, and Will Ferrel were funny.  I don't care who you are.  If you didn't laugh at that, there's some thing wrong with your funny bone.

They were right.  Helen Mirren is HOT.  If I were interested in girls, and 30 years older, I'd go find her.  WOW.

Rachel Weisz also falls into the hot category.  Beautiful.

Cate Blanchett.  Teh Hot.

Penelope Cruz, although a fine actress, fell victim to the misconception that pink muppet arms go on the bottom of a dress.  From the thighs up she was FABULOUS, though.

Why is Cameron Diaz's (how the heck do you pluralize that?) skin the same color as her hair?  It's disconcerting.  Personally, I didn't care for her dress.  

I like Nicole better as a redhead.  She was working that dress, though.

Hey, kristibisci, what did you think?

P.S.  Lisa Ling's dress looked just like my senior prom dress (which my mother MADE and was positively charming in 1991).  Except instead of back satin, mine was royal blue changeable taffeta.  Eat that, Ling.
I feel:: mischievousmischievous
Kate: Mr & Mrs Smug Bastardmugglechump on February 26th, 2007 05:19 pm (UTC)
Penelope Cruz, although a fine actress, fell victim to the misconception that pink muppet arms go on the bottom of a dress. From the thighs up she was FABULOUS, though.

*giggles hysterically* I saw a picture of her and thought something similar, but not nearly as funny.

Why is Cameron Diaz's (how the heck do you pluralize that?) skin the same color as her hair? It's disconcerting. Personally, I didn't care for her dress.

1) You're not pluralizing it, you are making it possessive. With names that end in S, I usually just stick an apostrophe at the end, with no additional S. Like: James' hat blew off in the wind. I don't know if Z works the same way or not. Or even if I do it right with the Ses.

2) The hair/skin thing is creepy. It makes me think of cabbage patch dolls with the beige yarn hair. Odd, I know.
Carrie Leigh: snark of warcarrie_leigh on February 26th, 2007 05:44 pm (UTC)
My old nemesis. Grammar.
Possesive. Right. I think I won't give her anymore screen time till her hair and skin go back to normal. Someone should tell the stars that it isn't normal to be tan in February. At the very least, not THAT tan. *shudders*
ex_justduch on February 26th, 2007 07:14 pm (UTC)
Icon spam!
Photobucket - Video and Image HostingPhotobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Carrie Leigh: Distracted by the sparklecarrie_leigh on February 26th, 2007 08:41 pm (UTC)
Re: Icon spam!
Thank you so much! You are the best EVER!

I love little Toto!
ex_justduch on February 26th, 2007 08:48 pm (UTC)
Re: Icon spam!
You're welcome! Glad you like them. :D
(Anonymous) on February 26th, 2007 09:47 pm (UTC)
who is lisa ling and where can i see a pix of the dress?
Carrie Leigh: intentionally blankcarrie_leigh on February 26th, 2007 09:55 pm (UTC)
I don't know how to put a picture here, so I'll email you.
kristibiscikristibisci on March 1st, 2007 02:11 am (UTC)
Oh wow! So sorry it took so long for me to get over here! I pretty much agree with everything you said, you just articulate everything better than I ever could. But, hey, you're a writer!

I can't believe I forgot to mention the Jack/Will/John song in my thoughts on my lj! They were a highlight for sure! I love them.

Ellen is a sweetie and if you saw her post-Oscars show, you'll appreciate her hosting job even more.

Cameron Diaz is a leatherface troll.

I really liked Maggie Gyllenhaal's dress which I didn't expect. She and Peter are such a cute couple.

Helen Mirren is sexy. I'm very jealous.

Nicole should go back to red.

I'm conflicted over JHud because I loved her in Dreamgirls, but she DID win the Oscar for her singing, in my opinion. She is awesome, though. DID NOT appreciate her space age mini-jacket AT ALL, however.

Carrie Leigh: snark of warcarrie_leigh on March 1st, 2007 12:06 pm (UTC)
oscar fashions
I don't know, I think "leatherface troll" and "space age mini-jacket" are very articulate, indeed. ;) Anyway, there wasn't that much to make fun of this year. *sigh* ...Until I got on Go Fug Yourself and saw Forrest Whittaker's wife's dress. *shudders* Play-doh flowers. Unfortunate.
kristibiscikristibisci on March 1st, 2007 06:55 pm (UTC)
Re: oscar fashions
*Heads on over to Go Fug Yourself*