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13 January 2012 @ 09:58 am
Win? Lose? Why don't you just play the damn game.  
Today's story: A tale of how two totally opposite people function in a marriage without one of them slipping the other arsenic and burying him in the backyard.

Ahem. That is, burying 'them' in the backyard. (OH, PLEASE. We all know who's going to be the bury-er. Who's got two thumbs and a can-do attitude? This girl.)

You all know I love my husband a lot. Tons. More than I could possibly say. But, like so many folks on the planet, we don't have a lot in common besides a smart mouth, a strong will and being the parents of two pretty cute blond boys.

He likes the outdoors... I believe nature is best viewed through a pane of glass with fantastic climate control and a fruity drink from which to sip.

He has to concentrate while he works... I am the queen of the multitask, talking and being busy at the same time. It took me a long time to understand that he didn't resent me when we were making candy cane cookies together. The complete silence didn't mean he didn't love me, it only meant that he was busy making the best candy cane cookies in the free-born, natural world.  Without interruptions.

He is fiercely competitive... while I really don't care whether or not I win or lose.

And that brings us to today's issue: Game playing with my other half, and how it NEVER goes well. NEVER.

My family played games when I was young. All kinds of games. My dad played football and basketball and baseball with us in the backyard, and we all played board games; Sorry, Battleship, Monopoly, Trivial Pursuit, all played at the dining table with the four of us having fun.

In all those games, I don't remember there ever being a sore loser, because I simply don't remember who won or lost. My parents might have let me win (I'm certain my dad did, on more than one occasion), but we played because playing is fun. It didn't matter who won. The act of playing is fun. If you won, then that was just the icing on the cake.

My husband, however, from a round of croquet to a game of Monopoly, treats each event as a bloodsport, where he is only happy if he crushes the competitor beneath the heel of his boot, battered and bloody and begging for mercy. Games in our home have ended in shouting, wailing, gnashing of teeth, storming about, and tears on more than one occasion. (And that was just Nolan.) He gets incensed that I don't care about winning and play lackadaisically, and I get beyond irritated that he treats a game of Monopoly like the balance of our lives depends upon collecting the two hundred dollars for passing GO.

The game-playing contention began in 1992, in the greenroom of the theatre at UTA, where a friendly game of spades ruined Nolan's chances with me for another four years. I eventually forgave him for calling me "stupid" when I reneged, but I've yet to play spades with him since. The trouble continues now with dominoes. DOMINOES. What, are we seventy? Are we going to start playing Canasta, next?

I'm certain that somewhere in-between our two philosophies of not caring and world domination lies the best course of action. And I'm sure we'll figure it out.

But if Nolan goes missing, check the backyard under the antique roses. Chances are good that he'll be there. Until then, I'm kicking shins and mouthing off and not giving a crap whether I win or lose.

I gotta be me. :)
 
 
I feel:: coldcold
I hear:: Pan Am
 
 
 
O Demanding One: Express: (BH) What The...?heyurs on January 13th, 2012 04:36 pm (UTC)

It's kinda crazy, huh? I will water the roses for you. ;)

Have you ever played cards with a bunch of hardcore freaks? I mean they were out for blood. If you played the wrong card, you were subject to harsh ugliness. O.o

Never again.

And yes, I can multitask like the dickens. *preens* x)

Carrie Leigh: coffeecarrie_leigh on January 13th, 2012 05:18 pm (UTC)
Solidarity, sister!

I don't like playing with hardcore people. It stresses me out. GAME implies FUN. If it isn't FUN to play a GAME, then I don't play. End of discussion.
O Demanding One: Winter: Warm & Cozy Socksheyurs on January 13th, 2012 09:58 pm (UTC)

Indeed.

lovedbygod2lovedbygod2 on January 13th, 2012 11:14 pm (UTC)
Absolutely!!
stardust_20stardust_20 on January 13th, 2012 04:54 pm (UTC)
Thankfully my husband and I are on the same page when it comes to games. What, I have to actually play? Neither of us cares for games much and we certainly don't care if we win or lose.

However my inlaws sound like you and they LOVE playing cards with other people. It never goes well. Just part of the reason I can't stand being with them. They end up griping and angry at one another so you can never ever let them be partners.

I read an interesting article recently about multitasking. I should post it. I'm not sure you'd like it, but it's an interesting read.
Carrie Leigh: 333 I'm only half evilcarrie_leigh on January 13th, 2012 05:15 pm (UTC)
I don't actually like to play, because he sucks the fun out of it with all the MUST WIN crap.

And post away. You won't hurt my feelings. I only multitask when it isn't something important. When I'm paying bills, no music, no television, no computer, because I must concentrate so I don't make a mistake. Other times, like when I'm cooking, I like to talk and watch TV, etc. while I'm doing it.
Elle Blessingwayelle_blessing on January 13th, 2012 04:56 pm (UTC)
Hahaha! Nolan and I sound a lot alike, both the single-minded focus (I'm ADD; either I'm what they call hyper focused, or I can't really pay attention to anything at all for more than a few minutes), and the fierce competitiveness. We stopped playing board games in my house when I was about 8 when a game of Sorry ended with my Dad winning, my Mom getting pissed that my Dad won, me throwing a tantrum and locking myself in the bathroom because I lost, and my brother not talking to anyone for hours. Coincidentally, my Dad was the only one that didn't really care if he won or not. Irony. (I tried to play games with my sister when she got older, but it was worse. As it was, when we happened to do our training sessions together with our one-on-one soccer coach, the soccer ball was almost secondary to us beating the shit out of each other as we fought to get the first goal -- cuz it was the only place Mom wouldn't yell at us for it.)</p>

Mr. Elle and I have tried playing games, but I always win (which is awesome), but then it has become no fun for me b/c there's no competition. Like a true woman, there's no pleasing me XD

Carrie Leigh: baseball hatcarrie_leigh on January 13th, 2012 05:17 pm (UTC)
Marriage. Game playing. What a riot.

It's nice to know that other families have these issues, too.
Elle Blessingwayelle_blessing on January 14th, 2012 01:05 am (UTC)
The ties that bind, and choke just a little ;D
seegrimseegrim on January 13th, 2012 06:36 pm (UTC)
I'm like you. I could take it or leave it. But, as usual, your take on things is hilarious. :)
Carrie Leigh: Extremely stubborn and suspicioucarrie_leigh on January 14th, 2012 01:25 am (UTC)
I just can't see getting worked up over something that doesn't matter.

And hi. :) How are ya?
seegrim: hand daisyseegrim on January 14th, 2012 01:58 am (UTC)
I'm good!

How are you? Looks like someone's having a birthday tomorrow! :) (sorry, that was so cheesy, but still...)

I'm leaving on Sunday to go visit my new niece and I couldn't be more excited! The best kind of babies are those you don't actually have to birth, I've decided.
Mala: Pipa13oct on January 13th, 2012 07:29 pm (UTC)
R and I are strangely the same. I couldn't care less and he has. to. win. every. single. time. We stopped paying games when it came to me nearly hitting him on his head after a game of UNO. Good to know that we aren't the only ones like this.
Carrie Leigh: ha ha tee heecarrie_leigh on January 14th, 2012 01:27 am (UTC)
It IS good to know that it isn't just us! Whew.
Elle Blessingwayelle_blessing on January 23rd, 2012 01:59 am (UTC)
This reminded me of you, and this entry XD

Carrie Leigh: Extremely stubborn and suspicioucarrie_leigh on January 24th, 2012 04:40 am (UTC)
Yes, that's us.

This is a much more widespread issue than I'd previously thought.