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08 May 2009 @ 08:36 pm
In Honor of Mothers Day Weekend...  
Everyone has a mother, or perhaps a mother figure in their lives. I'm grateful to my own mom, whom I've grown closer to as the years go by. My mom didn't teach me a lot of things, but I've managed to emulate her talents nonetheless; she's a fabulous cook, and she's a better seamstress than I'll ever be. We're also opposites in lots of ways. Where her home might be cluttered, it's always CLEAN, and mine is most often the other way around. The best thing about my mom? She's an awesome grandmother to my boys and I love watching them love her.

I remember lots of things about Mom, whose name is Carolyn, by the way. Isn't that a pretty name?

Anyhow, some stories...I grew up in the Dallas area, and even as a small child I remember being in the backseat of the car, driving around for hours, asking her, "Are you lost again?" ( a similarity between us.) Or her being a PTA president when I was in the second grade, or being a room mother in my class. When I was very young, I remember going to class with her (she taught fourth grade) and wanting to be one of her students. (I am a teacher.) In later years, when I was fifteen and difficult, she gave me nuggets of invaluable advice: "Pretty is as pretty does," and "Whiners leave," (I use that one a lot) "Pain for Beauty," and "No one likes a navel gazer." (Do you see a theme here? I guess I was pretty self-involved as a young woman.) She also pointed out that sometimes I was nicer to total strangers than I was to my own family (and to reconsider that), and that I should think of others before I considered my own wants. (I'd beat my kids over the head with this one if I thought it would make it sink in better.) She also loved me, reassured me, dried my many tears and stayed with me though countless illnesses, nursed me back to health a hundred times, came and stayed with me after I had my two sons and continues to be a rock when I need her. The cool thing is now? She uses me for that sometimes, too.

Anyway, Mom's leaving on Sunday for NYC and probably won't get the Mother's day gift I sent (*sigh* it'll probably get there on Monday) and I wanted to publicly thank her for being my mom. It was a thankless task at best sometimes, and I appreciate her diligence in raising me right, and for still being there when I need her. (Love you, Mom!)

So, friends! What's your favorite "Mother" story? Either about your own mother or your best moment of being a mother? Tell me, tell me! Share!
I feel:: calmcalm
I hear:: Ain't She Sweet - The Beatles
seegrim: beautifulseegrim on May 9th, 2009 03:08 am (UTC)
Aw, Carrie, how sweet to post this about your mother. She's obviously a wonderful woman, because I've not known many people that I love as much as you. :)
Carrie Leigh: hugcarrie_leigh on May 9th, 2009 03:16 am (UTC)
That's a very sweet thing to say. I love you, too. :)
seegrim: hand daisyseegrim on May 9th, 2009 03:20 am (UTC)

*hugs you for real*

I didn't know you were still here.

Ping me!
Jandy the Gnome Whisperer: Heart - Candiesjandjsalmon on May 9th, 2009 04:13 am (UTC)
Hrm... I will share. I have lots of bad stories. My mom was a pretty selfish woman after her divorce in 1981. I was a very little girl and I didn't know different, but now looking back, I think she went through a mid-life crisis - which is understandable when you think of 19 years of marriage to a man who cheated all the time and made her feel worthless etc. SO when their divorce went through, my mother sometimes forgot that she had a several kids at home and she would spend the little money we had on dresses for herself so she could go dancing or something while we were scrounging for what to make for dinner.

HOWEVER - my story is not to list my mother's failings (she has lots).

When I got older and married and moved away from my wonderful little home town, I realized what else my mother did.

I don't know about you guys - but there are certain images that come up when I think of a tiny community where everyone knows everyone (indeed we're all related to one another) and everyone talks about each other. We were the only kids in the school with divorced parents for a LOT of years. My mum was the divorcee who MUST be after everyone's husbands (*rolls eyes*). She was a little loud. She worked a lot (on Sunday's too - SHOCKING!). This was what she stayed with.

But by staying in our little sleepy town, we were two blocks from our grandparents and we had a really strong church support system. The school was awesome. We made good and decent friends. We grew up someplace safe.

My mother stayed in that tiny town, where the gossips spread horrible stories about her - where she didn't have any comfort or friends of her own - so why? Why would she when she could be a Nurse anywhere - just meld into a city full of lot of other people who had broken homes?

She stayed there and braved their stares and gossipyness and the loneliness because she knew it was best for us. It was the best place for us to be raised. I am SO GRATEFUL that she was brave. She (mostly) got out of her selfish period of mid-life crisisyness and was a really fun mum - a good mother - well, as good as she could be given the circumstances.

Does it excuse some of her failings? No way - but what stands out when I think about Mother's Day - is the bravery of my mother rather than her selfishness. Probably not the squishy thoughts that most of you all will have - and I could easily have told stories about Jay's mum - and how she's a peacemaker and always sees the good in people (and is a genealogy fiend). But yeah - this was what your story made me think of Carrie.

Happy Mother's Day, guys!! :)
Carrie Leigh: little carrie readingcarrie_leigh on May 9th, 2009 01:28 pm (UTC)
That's really beautiful way to think about things, Jessica. Thanks for sharing.
dragonsangel68: TW - Edward facedragonsangel68 on May 9th, 2009 01:51 pm (UTC)
That's really lovely.

My story isn't about my own mother, but about my mother-in-law. She was an extraordinary woman, especially when it came to her love of children. Unfortunately, she only got to enjoy being a grandmother for two and a half years before cancer claimed her, but in that time she formed such a strong bond with Mitch that it seemed totally unbreakable. Watching her with him always warmed my heart, whether she was playing with him or doing something as simple as feeding him. I often wonder what it would have been like if she had of lived; what sort of influence she would have had a Mitch as he grew up...
Carrie Leigh: Carrie frivolitycarrie_leigh on May 10th, 2009 09:49 pm (UTC)
That's very sweet. I have a fabulous mother-in-law, too.
maureen: faith phonemaureen on May 9th, 2009 10:13 pm (UTC)
What a great idea. It was good to hear your mother story too. My mother story isn't so great. It's not the worst in the world by far, but so not the best. Have you seen Debbie Reynolds when she guest stars on Will and Grace as Grace's mom? That's my mom, minus the career in showbiz. The criticism, the oddly timed goofiness... my general dread when I have to talk to her.

THAT SAID, I believe we get what we need. Debbie was Adam's mom. (Adam was the love of my life about five years ago... and so far, for all time.) She and I clicked from the moment we met. As Adam and I became more and more serious, Debbie and I just started doing things just the two of us. We read the same book at the same time. We watched movies together. We smoked a bazillion cigarettes and sat on their back deck looking at the stars. We had countless cups of coffee together. She was wry and funny and loved me like her own. She was kind and nurturing and had the balls to tell me when she disagreed with me... though always in a respectful way. To this say (Adam got serious with one other person past me), it's my picture she keeps up at the house. We still send each other presents and talk on the phone. Two years ago she came out here to see me. I honestly think of Debbie more as my own mom or stepmom ever was. Prior to meeting her, I hadn't had much luck in the parental department... but honestly today? I feel blessed. Just writing this has inspired me to call her for Mother's Day. When Adam and I broke up, one of the things I dreaded the most was NOT getting to be this woman's daughter-in-law. Silly, huh?

Anyway, Happy Mother's Day Carrie. I loved your story and I think you rock as a mom. Thanks for making me think of Debbie and prompting me to pick up the phone.

Edited at 2009-05-09 10:14 pm (UTC)
Carrie Leigh: C is for Carriecarrie_leigh on May 10th, 2009 09:50 pm (UTC)
Yay, I'm so glad. She'll probably love to hear from you. :)